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| We are obviously not really Tokio Hotel. Remember that when you're sending us desperate emails demanding our phone numbers. |
Bill, Tom, Georg, Gustav, Evil George, David Jost, Andreas, Saki 3-24-08
my brothur is not sik!! he is just fake!! he fake so he can get the pudding cup und ice creams for sore throtes. do not believ any of his words he is just tird of sing und wanting knew carer job. last i know he is wanting to atend clown collejge. CAN U IMAGIN? puddig cups!!! ugggh nein. -.- $TOM$ hallo thnk you : ) i think i am better with all the rest i get and LOVe from the fans arond the worldd! it helps me surviv this and stay strong.  - k bill! Chloe, I want a time machine so that I may go back to 2002 and reclaim my dignity. And my brother’s right hand. It is the gift I’d give myself and him. -Georg OMFG CHLOE! D: I AM SO IN TATTERS, LIEK, TOTAL TATTERS RIGHT NOW. SHAMBLES. PIECES OF ME. POOR BILL, HE IS LIEK SUCH A TOTAL TROOPER N’ STUFF, YOU KNOW, CUZ LIEK, TALKING IS HIS LIFE!!!! HE HASN’T SAID A WORD IN FIVE DAYS CUZ OF HIS THROAT! IT TOTALLY KILLS ME THAT HE’S SICK AND W/E. D: D: D: D: D: BUT DON’T WORRY, WITH TOM LIEK TOTESTALLY GONE N’ JUNK, I’M TAKING CARE OF BILL xxHARDCORExx. I’M TAKING HIS TEMPERATURE LIEK ALL THE TIME N’ FEEDING HIM SOUPS AND READING HIM ALL OF HIS FAVORITE VOGUES!!! SO I’VE GOT THIS ONE HANDLED. TOM WOULD BE LIEK, SO PROUD OF ME. XD TOTALLY YOURS, ~*~Andreas~*~
hallu ladys ;) wel wat can i sey u all must fiund me.. irsistabil! i cannot help this ;) anuthur jahr of FUN sond gut 2 mich.. plos i am 18 all this year now to so.. wat ^_^ $TOM$ Arrianna, dahsee, ahnee, clarah, and christinah, Yes! You guys ROCK! ;-) wate sory who are you again? :) - bill Ladies, I want to take this opportunity to thank you for all of the amazing work you’ve done, and to thank my fellow bandmates and friends (even you Andreas) for a year unlike any other. I feel like we’ve all grown closer as a result of being forced to spend time together every two weeks answering these often moronic and banal questions. I’m a better man because of you. My frustration and self imposed celibacy (direct results of CFF exposure, thanks to your site) has increased my chest, thigh, and bicep circumference by 15% this calendar year. No phone book stands a chance in my presence. I shred all yellowbooks and juice apples with my bare hands. My muscle mass thanks you. -Georg Ladies - Fun? I would rather break open a piñata filled with rabid ferrets than spend one more year doing this. But I suppose my options are limited. .gustav. OMFG GALS! IT WAS LIEK TOTALLY TUBULAR N' JUNK! XD TOTALLY YOURS, ~*~Andreas~*~ Girls! Wow, time flies, does it not? I remember a time when our journey together had only just begun. We were all finding our ways together down this gold-paved path to the stars, and now today we stand together on a mountain of success, hard work and glittery, glittery dreams. Truly, girls, you have made me believe in magic. Here’s to another year of awesome tunes, tight pants, and meaningful dialogue! D. Jost Ladies, Has it only been a year? It feels as though I’ve been wallowing in the trenches for an eternity. Honing my neck-snapping skills, perfecting my scowl, protecting my young wards through the thick and thin of this world. *cracks knuckles, as ever* Saki Bonjour mes filles jolies! Ah, oui... I am forever in ze debt of your fathers for including me in all your rendezvous... I am like ze tiger, perched and ready to strike. BEWARE! MUA HA!! - Evil George
lacy pantys i wud be the petir griffin from familys guy. or may b .. tha littl mermade did u see her t!ts??? NICE RAKK i wud just fell them all day lang.. unter die sea wat! $TOM$ O WAIT CAN I CHANG ANSUER?? Lucy, do you kno I am a cartoon befor ? MINIMOY. I forgat what it is. Sum littl creeture? I did not actuelly see this movei. I find out that I am not really in it at all so I go get hamburgor insted. Anywey no thank you to cartoon I think I will stay as bill. or ok may be a maus they are alwis so sneeky in cartoon. : ) - bill the maus : ) Lacey, I think I'd probably be the Incredible Hulk, since you know, I crush things with my manly fists. But I'd be the Incredible Hulk with soul. A sort of new age Rennaissance Hulk, if you follow. -Georg Lacy - I would be McGruff the Crime Dog, just so I could lean back and let children watch me do nothing about crime, so that maybe a new generation would be filled with the same kind of life altering disappointment I face every day. .gustav. FINALLY, A QUESTION TOTALLY WORTH ANSWERING! *_* I'D SO TOTALLY BE GEM OR W/E. SHE'S LIKE SO FREAKING FIERCE AND W/E AND LIKE, COLOR COORDINATED. HER CLOTHES MATCH HER OUTFITS, ALWAYS, AND NOT MANY PEOPLE CAN PULL THAT OFF... BILL. UM. XD I COULD TOTES ROCK THE PINK HAIR. TOTALLY YOURS, ~*~ANDREAS~*~ Andreas, I've been trying to be less snobbish lately. You know, let up on my grammar policing ways and just go with the flow. Punctuating fangirl's run on sentences was really bad for my blood pressure. But for the love of shit, Andreas, lose the caps lock! It's bad enough your font is pink and you continuously spell "like" as if you're dyslexic, which I know you're not. And don't tell me you're having a blond moment, because we all know you're actually a red head. -Georg Georg! YOU CAN'T LIEK CENSOR ME N' SHYT! IT'S TOTES MY ARTISTIC EXPRESSION N' JUNK. AND LIEK, MY CAPS LOCK KEY IS BROKE SO... DIAF!!1!!1!!1!! :O Totally Yours (NOT), ~*~ANDREAS~*~ Lacy! Batman. That guy’s got it all. Cool clothes, lots of money and gadgets, Robin… Plus, he fights crime, and that’s always cool in my book! Bif! Pow! Jostman Miss Lacy, The Hulk. You wouldn’t like me when I’m mad. Saki Lacy... I imagine you all would be thinking ze Frenchman would say Pepe LePew... I choose to let you all think zat... You all think I am so predictable... Evil George
o snap let m tel you of my advinturs with out bil!! furst since bill is gone i first get gut nite of sleep. he is not arond to bothur me and say tomi"" i see the monstur make go away! (bcoz somtim i get scard to) so it is nice to slep thru mosntur invasions.. wenn i wak up i can eat all da sereals i am wanting. frustd flak, corn flak, fruite pebbls!! THEYYYRRREE GRATE lmao nbext i get dressd! i put on watevir cloiths i want. but i do this eviryday so. ;) by noon of day i am bord so i call bill to see wat he is do. if he is not busy we go hang out. SEE! idk wat u expekt.. $TOM$ Sheman, Most think the time I go in the hospitol for a bug sting was the longest I am gone from Tom. NO! ; ) Mutti will not admid to this but there was once when me and tom are babys and she is very tire from careing for us .She sees tom and her sleepy eye makes double vison! I am crawlng around somewere pleying. but she dos not know this she thinks her two babys are there :b so I crawl away and I am lost for a wile. Even more long then the stay in hospitol. I wishe I coud tell you of this adventur I have but I was too littl to remembur . - bill Dear SHENAN, I hope you never face the same abandonment issues that Tom faces. Abandonment issues about the toilet. After a night of heavy drinking. No wait. That is a hope of mine. .gustav.
o shit son u brave lol gustavvvv go git her lol $TOM$ Joyce - Now I file a restraining order. .gustav. Joyce! That’s a pretty old name. How old are you, Joyce? Because that’s a mom name. Mothers are supposed to do nice, age-appropriate things like knitting and giving sage advice. Not wield sticks at young men. Tsk, tsk, D. Jost Miss Joyce, *pointed glare* Regards, Saki
um.. i do not think this is gut idee.. sory wat do u say abot mutti be invisbil???? :\ fuk $TOM$ KAIYE! If mutti is invisible do you mean then she is like a ghost? Is she wach over me like in movie with patrik swayzee? Becase I find this very creep. When I see this movie I think ew go away patrik give some privecy you creepi!!! Unles you mean inivisble like superpowered? Then this ROCKS ;-). Supermutti! She can protect me and tom all the time from everything and take me to go fly arond. she is even more strong then saki then. @__@ saki is super but not like a mutti can be. like when she makes a hot chocolat or does a tummy rub. saki is not as good for this : ( but it is not his falt he has rogh hands. -bill Kaiye, The sense you make? No. -Georg PS: Sorry... sorry! I didn't mean to... snap at you. It's just... Andreas. The guy's pushed me over the edge. Kaiye - Horses are not fun. They are responsibility. Unless you train two horses to count...to count the amount of times I've lost faith in this world. That might be faintly amusing. .gustav.
lothyan wel=nn i make the coment abut othur man penus i do not actualy KNOW wat penus size they be may i say i am not gay like you imply! i simpli compaer my pinus to your penus and i think we all know who is winning this ;) actualt idk i just liek saying georg has the small penus $TOM$ Lothians, Ah! I thank you very much for this gift. it ROCKS ;-) but, I think may be it gets damage on the way to theshow? I remembor I think to my self, o wat a cute leaf shirt!!! But all one pece???? Uh ohhhh must have rippd : ( it is ok!!! It happens. I sew backup after I am done with needelpoint cat projeckt ok? I am very good with clothing repares. See what I make from shiny black cape I find in the road?  PANTS! See how everyon loves? : ) - Bill Lothian, I am slightly concerned about how much Tom seems to know about my John Thomas. It all started two years ago when he walked in on me during my naked yoga hour. I was in the Downward Facing Dog position at the time, carrying half of my weight on my massive genitals. Tom's never been the same since. As for the CN tower, it was alright. Tom had much the same reaction to it as he did my genitals. -Georg Dear Lothian, Oh dear me, goodness gracious, great googley moogley, the CN Tower was the most impressive thing I've ever seen. In fact, in my entire trip to the Western Hemisphere, that is the one and only thing I remember. It was just that impressive. I'm so glad you brought it up, so that I had this opportunity to share with you how much I loved that tower. Please leave. .gustav. HAI GURL- I WASN'T ALLOWED ON THE TOUR N' WTF/E. D: SEE, IT'S LIEK, ILLEGAL FOR ME TO COME WITHIN 50 YARD OF TOM ANYMORE AND I TOTES DON'T WANNA GO TO JAIL. D: D: D: D: ORANGE JUST ISN'T MY COLOR. I'M MORE OF A SPRING, NOT AN AUTUMN, THOUGH I COULD TOTALLY LIEK ROCK A PRISON JUMPSUIT. TOTALLY YOURS, ~*~ANDREAS~*~ Andreas, Those... backward frowns... why?!? -Georg BECAUSE I CAN!!!1!!!!! TOTALLY YOURS, ~*~ANDREAS~*~ Little Lothi! I was there! In New York there were many fans taking pictures of The Joster! How embarrassed I was to see the pictures later and notice my own unsightly underarm sweat. Let that be a lesson to us all, that being busy is no excuse for ignoring proper hygiene! Rolling out doubt and rolling on charm, D. Jost Miss Lothian, Life is my workout routine. Although, I have recently begun taking Yoga lessons, which I find very relaxing. Being able to let go of troubling thoughts and stresses is very vital in life. Also, yoga increases ones flexibility, which is always good in my line of work, when sometimes I must reach over a row of girls to capture the troublesome fan in a crowd. Regards, Saki
it be liek that $TOM$ Laurie, no I am Tom hi imtom ; ) I have a big pennis for all the girl - $TOMI $ Laurie,  Hello, I am so tired of this! Okay, let me start with Gustav. What is wrong with you? All you do is drink; I miss the old Gustav! Come back! Georg, it’s good that you haven’t changed that much, except for the whole spell check thing. Why have you stopped correcting people's grammar? Bill, you’re still you. I think. Yeah. Tom, you are still the same, too; just a little weird, but that’s just you. Andreas, I love your outfits! Oh my God, where do you shop? Evil George, I hate you. I am aware that you’re stalking me. If you don’t answer this I will find you. I have drumsticks, too! -Georg Laurie - First of all, the old Gustav was someone I hired. Second, I really enjoy drinking. It makes your conversation almost bearable. .gustav. OMFG, I LOVE MY OUTFITS 2!!!!!!!!!111!!!!!!!! I LIEK, MEET SO MANY TOTALLY KOOL PPL ON THIS SITE WHO HAVE LIEK SO MUCH N' COMMON WITH ME N' STUFF. U GUYZ ARE LIEK TOTALLY MY BEST FRIENDS, WELL BESIDES BILL (AND TOM, BUT SHH, BILL GETS JEALOUS N' JUNK, HEHE) XD NEWAY, I TOTES SHOP AT ABERCROMBIE AND FITCH, I'M LIEK A COMPLETE PREP! HEH. WE SHOULD LIEK TOTALLY HIT THE MALL 2GETHER SOEMTIME, GURL! TOTALLY YOURS, ~*~ANDREAS~*~ Miss Laurie, Ma’am, please do not crack your knuckles, that can be construed as a threat, and will be dealt with accordingly. Regards, Saki Laurie... Ze stars! Zey are in my eyes! - Evil George
um i dont want 2 talk abot it $TOM$ Ehvan, I am sory but you are a boy and from usa relly we can not marry. it is in the rules there : ( Oh also Ich bin nicht schwul. But thank you anywey you ROCK ;-) - bill Evan, I truly enjoyed the USA and all of your Ivy League schools. It was a joy to visit my old alma mater, Brown. I got to hang out with some old college buddies before our gig in New York and it was like old times. Or how I'd imagine old times would have been had I been allowed to physically attend the University instead of taking Distance Education courses. Basically, my old roommate and I (we shared an 800 X 600 chat room for three years), watched dubbed anime and browsed 4chan. It was exhausting. I can't party like that anymore. I'm not a kid anymore, you know. -Georg EVan - I ask myself that question every time I wake up. .gustav. ...imissyouguystoopleasehelpmetheyhavemerunningerrandsforjostnowandidon'tthinkicanhandleanotherdeeptissuemassageitslike caressingatenyearoldgigglingboypleasehelpmejared
HAHA HAHHA HAH AHHA HAHh HAHA HAA gay $TOM$ Dear citizen, Well it is great that you care abot this issu. We decid to have serios talk with gustav wen it stops beinge so funny. And anyway is no big deal the things he dos. Like the tatoo, it looks very good yes? This is becase I send him to my tatoo man. He can fix all! For instence the freiheit on my arm i get drunk and it says 'balls' on it but then i have it fix and now it is betiful. - not concerned bill : ) Concerned Citizen, I used to be concerned for Gustav, but then he broke a beer bottle over my cranium, and now I'm just bitter and slightly concussed. As for the tattoo rumor, what Gustav does to his body is his own business and the bottle's... -Georg "Concerned Citizen" - Oh yes, that seems extremely plausible and accurate. I can see why you would believe that story. .gustav. Concerned Citizen, Mua Ha! ah, oui! All going to plan!! - Evil George
wat $TOM$ Tausend, thisquestion has me scarde I donte know sory??? ;_-; - ;-___; xX1000OceansXx, I grew up with David Jost for a role model, what do you think? And while no one in the band has drug problems, take the following into consideration: Tom has taken his hat off three times in two years. Let me average that out for you. Every eight months his forehead gets some reprieve from its cotton, sweatband prison. Gustav puts Guinness in his cornflakes. Bill slow dances with himself. Help????? -Georg Dear Person Who Chooses Our Questions, Why? Just...why? I don't need this responsibility. .gustav. OMFG YOUR BROTHERS SOUND TOTALLY HOT N' STUFF. CAN I WRITE TO THEM IN THE KLINKER? I TOTALLY LOVE BAD BOYZ. TOTALLY YOUR BROTHERS', ~*~ANDREAS~*~ 1000 Etc... Maybe try giving "Vergessene Kinder" a listen... Je ne sais pas... - Evil George
umm aight but my massiv penus mite scare ppl idk mayb i just stay in cloths ok?? ;) $TOM$ Ekat - That is no favor. To anyone. Please, think of the children. .gustav. omfg i liek totally don't remember submitting this question totally yours, ~*~ANDREAS~*~ Andreas, AH HA! Your caps lock ISN'T BROKEN. -Georg GEORG GET OUT OF MY LIFE OK um. LIEK. TOTALLY YOURS, ~*~ANDREAS~*~ Ekat... As le macro de chat would say... DO. NOT. WANT. - Evil George
nah i got the biggur penus wat ._. i vote green ja but givin mein vote to da third parti is just stealin votes from tha majority. u must b a responsibil voter, as voteing is a privlidg. ROK THA VITE!! VOTE ODER DIE!!!!!!!1 #*(&$* $TOM$ Kat! Hmm…. I just beleve to let people free and happy and live how they wish and be nice to echother with no war. Oh and lot of mony for everyon!! So if I waas in America and can vote then I go for the one who thinks this too : ) politiks is so easy! Pumping iron? UG I TELL YOU ALREDY. ICH BIN NICHT SCHWUL : ( - UGGGGGG Katie, Ron Paul. No exceptions. -Georg PS: But seriously, Obama. Katie - I haven't been following the election, because I'm not American. That's the end of that. .gustav. BILL K 4 PRESIDENT! XD TOTALLY YOURS, ~*~ANDREAS~*~
wat?? who is saying this??? t!ts or gtfo $TOM$ Maybe?, Thank you for this complement! you ROCK ;-) and I am glad you like how my hairs are : ) do you ask for a favorit child memory of my hair? One time I get purpel colors that come in a tube and I put on the sink. Then tom on acident thinks it is toothpast and get purples in his mouth haha !!!! It was funny and I laagh at him but then he throws up a littl and I stop becase that is not so funny. Also once I find a wig in a garbege can and it was very long and red so I make pretend as a little mermade! But mutti took from me becase it had a badsmell. : ( - bill Maybe, Which one? -Georg Maybe - If all of my drinks are on the house, I will most certainly stop by. .gustav. Maybe, baby, Heyyy, thanks! Actually, a lot of people have been flattering the Jostmeister lately. Which has led me to my new merchandising idea! A Jost Calendar! Twelve months of all Jost, all the time! Let me all-knowing gaze fall upon you and your household throughout the year. Just €12.99! D. Jost
Sarah, *shreds French phone book* -Georg Sarah - It's letters like these that only encourage his horrible behavior. Or should I say "evil" behavior? .gustav. OH NO YOU LIEK TOTALLY DIDN'T! AND I'M NOT DELUDED, I LIEK, ALWAYS RECYCLE N' STUFF! :O I LIEK NEVER DELUDE THE ENVIRONMENT! YOU TOTALLY DON'T EVEN KNOW ME! TOTALLY YOURS, ~*~ANDREAS~*~ Sarah, Ah, merci! However, I am not dating at ze moment. I have been burned before. - Evil George |
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